Recognizing my parents This post is my contribution to the September 2026 IndieWeb Carnival topic "Parenting", hosted by winther: https://winther.sysctl.dk/indieweb-carnival-september-2026-parenting/ My parents are good people, and I think about this often. About how lucky I am to have had a childhood free from abuse, trauma, or neglect. To have had an adolescence where I was encouraged, supported, and redirected towards interests and passions that have stayed with me into adulthood. In this life I have been blessed in many ways, and nowhere is this more apparent than with my family and especially with my parents. My parents accomplished what I imagine most good parents hope for: to create a foundation for their children's future that is better than what they themselves were given. My dad is of the generation where corporeal punishment was very much his childhood experience: he was beaten routinely, and in those days nobody though anything was particularly wrong with this. I can remember being spanked once, ever. As an adult, I asked my mom about it. Why was I only spanked that one time? Her answer: your father and I learned early on that we didn't want to be the kind of parents who hit our kids. All of my grandparents were poor and uneducated. Most didn't even finish high school, and all worked extremely blue-collar (and frankly, often menial) jobs for the entirety of their working lives. Somehow, my parents (and all of their siblings!) not only graduated college, but pretty much maxed out their education stats: one has their master's degree, and the others all got PHDs. You know how dads have these stories that they love to tell over and over? One of my dad's favorites is about how he put himself through school by working at a grocery store (sidebar: can you even imagine that being possible these days?) and sleeping on the pallets of dog food in between shifts because he was too exhausted to drive home. I've rolled my eyes and this story many times over many years, but taken in context it's damn impressive. As a kid, my parents were very against candy and video games. It was very frustrating at the time. I mean, all of my friends had this new thing called the "Nintendo Entertainment System", so why couldn't we get one? And why, instead of the candy they got, could I only eat this weird organic "fruit leather" that my mom brought home from the food co-op she shopped at? Soon enough, my dad brought home our first family computer (I believe it was the IBM PC/AT with an Intel 286 processor) and I did get to play *some* games. I could barely read, and I was learning to navigate DOS and use the CLI. My favorite games were Starquake, and later Zeliard. Then, in the late 80's, my mom discovered this game company called Sierra. She started bringing home "adventure" games from their catalog, which we would play through together. I can't think of a better way to teach a young kid to love technology. I could go on, and there's a lot more to this story, perhaps to be saved for another day. Suffice to say that my parents did pretty well for themselves and for their kids. They didn't have easy lives, but they worked hard, and they created the right conditions for their own children to thrive. I can unequivocally say that my own lived experience provided me with a great blueprint for developing into the kind of parent that I knew wanted to be someday. It's often said that we all inevitably turn into our parents as we age, and when I recognize their teachings shine through in the way that I act with my own children, I can only feel thankful to have been given this gift. With gratitude, ~nullish NB: since winther recently wrote about Calvin and Hobbes on his blog, I'll close by sharing a short "parenting" C&H anecdote of my own. My parents were huge Watterson fans, and had most of his collections around the house during my youth. I would read them over and over, memorizing many of my favorite lines. After something like 35 years, I can probably still recite the "Barney's Dad" poem verbatim. Apparently the idea of locking my dad in the cellar filled me with glee as a child, don't ask me why. Of course, as a parent myself, I've exposed my kids to these same influences, and they've enjoyed C&H in the same way that I did at their ages. As I get older, I find myself relating to Calvin's dad more and more - a typical experience I'm sure - and I find great delight in telling my children to do things "because it builds character", of course saying this with a wink and a grin because I know that they're in on the joke. Reply to this post via email --- email blog index website