Parcel liveblogging flickr photo by NomadWarMachine shared under a Creative Commons (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) license Today’s TDC says The Guardian published a giggle generating list of 18 terms describing the current state of tech. Use at least 5 in an uplifting poem or maybe a motivational poster? https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2026/aug/18/dickovers-baggravation-botiquette-18-new-words-tech-hellscape I chose ‘parcel liveblogging’ The sheer amount of hand-holding that comes with ordering a package online is frankly unnecessary. You can expect to receive messages informing you of every single step in the process. Officially you will receive the “We’ve got your order!” email, the “Your order is on the move!” email, the “Your order has reached our network!” email, the “Your order is progressing through our network!” email and the “Your order will be delivered today!” email. Unofficially, you will also receive the “We attempted delivery!” email (accompanied by a photo of the corner of a shipping container nowhere near your house), and the email telling you to collect it from a depot 20 minutes away. I asked Nightcafe for: a brown paper parcel tied up with string. It has arms and legs and a big smile. It has speech bubbles coming from it saying “I will be here soon”, “nearly there”, “can’t wait to meet you” and “what is your pet called?” You can see the result, including typos not made by me, at the top of this page.